I remember what I was doing during certain world changing events. The announcement of Operation Dessert Storm, the Rodney King riots, the infamous OJ Simpson car chase that interrupted game 5 of the NBA Finals, the September 11 attacks of the World Trade Center, and the initial announcement of the shelter-in-place orders brought on by the covid 19 pandemic. There are too many to list. Each event unfolded unexpectedly and changed my experience in one way or another. The pandemic was an umbrella that covered a variety of daily expectations that became overwhelming to juggle. The balance between being a working mom and stay at home responsibilities were beyond anything I had experienced before. Can you relate?
The balance between being a working mom and stay at home responsibilities were beyond anything I had experienced before. Can you relate?
I had taken the day off from work to attend an event at my youngest daughter’s school. I had not kept up with the news so I hadn’t heard about anything related to covid but other schools had pulled out of the competition. We went through the event questioning what was to come before the announcement was made in Illinois that the state was going to shut down. I listened to the news feeling unsettled about what was to come.
Who could have imagined the magnitude of everything that would unfold in wave after wave of extended timelines and closures? The overwhelm settled in rather quickly as different aspects of motherhood came cashing in all at once. The daily routines of getting up and getting ready to be on the go day in and day out had come to an unexpected standstill.
It has been two years since the series of mandates defined what life was supposed to look like. Not knowing what to expect from all of it came with much uncertainty. Yet, as the world has reopened in different ways, sometimes things still seem uncertain. Worry and fear has continued to unravel people. I observe many of us to be changed in one way or another. But I am determined to move forward from this collective trauma hopeful for a more intentional future.
It wasn’t until recently that I had a conversation with a group of colleagues about our collective and individual experiences during the beginning of the closures. I was amazed at how different each of our experiences were. We lived through the pandemic as a collective, but each of us had a different story to tell. It was interesting to observe how some of us still had a significant emotional response to the telling of our own stories. We are helping professionals, we transitioned to a remote learning environment, became accustomed to meeting in a virtual format, and we lived through this experience together. The opportunity to share with each other became an outlet to process without realizing how helpful it would be.
Some of the questions that come to mind regarding the experiences of others during this time are:
- Have you shared your initial pandemic experience with anyone?
- Have you spoken about how your overall pandemic experience has impacted you?
- How were you impacted by loss of connection, community, or loved ones?
- If you became sick with covid, what was that like?
- How has your experience changed you?
According to the CDC, throughout the pandemic there has been an increase in the percentage of adults who have reported clinically relevant symptoms of depression and anxiety. Are you represented in the increase?
According to the CDC, throughout the pandemic there has been an increase in the percentage of adults who have reported clinically relevant symptoms of depression and anxiety. Are you represented in the increase?
I believe that the closures created the space to magnify underlying emotional needs in our lives that were already present, in addition to newly created stressors that formed. It stripped away a level of busyness outside of our homes that allowed us to avoid dealing with the troubles within our walls. Life became so busy within the walls of our homes that the isolation from the routines outside of our homes made it impossible to ignore the parts of our lives we weren’t ready to face. Loneliness, sadness, and unresolved pain were silent companions to many already. Magnified through the lens of isolation.
I have come to the conclusion that real life community matters. Although technology made it possible to find new ways to connect, the ability to connect in real life cannot be replaced. As I process the way community shifted, my story is still unfolding. I am still being challenged to face all of the unexpected changes that have changed the way I do life and who I share it with. Can you relate?
I hope that you will create the space necessary to process your story. That you will realize the power held in your words to be able to shape a more intentional and meaningful future as a new normal continues to unfold.
If you are feeling overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings that are making it difficult to function on a daily basis, please reach out for help. Loneliness, sadness, pain, and hopelessness don’t have to continue to be part of your story. Talking to someone can make a bigger difference than you may realize. There were many things over the course of these past two years that we had no control over. While this will be the case in many things that we experience in life, may you realize that you can control whether or not you will let go of pain and grab a hold of hope.
May you realize that you can control whether or not you will let go of pain and grab a hold of hope.
Perhaps this is the time to consider how you are practicing self-care. Especially as a busy mom juggling all of the changes that took place over the past years along with how to manage all of the changes moving forward. If you’re not sure where to start, download my free Self-Care Planning Guide to help you set some realistic expectations and get started.
You expressed what so many of us have felt during the past several years. It has been very challenging at times. Thank you for putting our emotions into words.
Hello Cleo,
Thank you so much for your response!
Aida